Friday, August 5, 2011

Hard Week

So as you all know we had a chemical pregnancy AGAIN... Well what you may have forgotten is that my Brother-in-law, Sister-in-law and their kids were in town.. Their kids are 8 years old, 6 years old, 3 years old and 9 months.. SUPER HARD WEEK for me.. I lost it all day Monday and everyone handled it pretty well.. I stayed in my room for a few hours and cried my eyes out and no one bothered me.. Hubby came in at some point and just held me.. He is so amazing and strong.. We decided we WILL TRY AGAIN.. I just don't know when.. I told my friend what I was feeling regarding having to wait for almost 2 years and she said we can go now if we are ready.. I WOULD LOVE TO start again immediately but really, I think we do need this break.. I am worn out emotionally and financially. I never thought $30,000 later we would still be at the beginning of our journey.. I talked to our lawyer and explained everything to her and she said changes can be made to update our contract for minimal costs (I hope her idea of minimal and mine are the same thing!) and I have to talk to someone at the new clinic we want to go to and see if the psych eval would need updating as well and if not, the only issue with waiting would be my age and if my FSH and AMH changed in a bad way, since right now they are both perfect (I don't know how considering my last 2 cycles sucked!) SO, right now we are gathering info.. My friend said if we need to go first we can and that makes me feel better knowing we don't HAVE to wait if we can swing it financially.. So this post is to let everyone know OUR JOURNEY ISN'T OVER YET! :)



14 comments:

  1. I'm praying for that all will work out as you wish.

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  2. Aw so glad to hear you have hope and are going to continue fighting this fight:) I know it must have been an awful week. Sending you hugs!

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  3. Bobbie- Thank you so much, you are always so supportive and it means the world to me!

    Sarah- Thanks, I never have been a quitter, but the money and stress of it is so daunting! This definitely lets you know what you are made of!

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  4. I'm so glad you have decided not to stop trying yet. As always, I'm keeping you in my prayers. *hugs*

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  5. I too am glad you're going to continue!! You're on my prayer list! :)

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  6. Good. Because if I haven't given up on your journey yet then you shouldn't be giving up yet either!

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  7. I am so relieved to hear that!!! Keep us posted - I'll be watching!! :D What clinic are y'all thinking of transferring to?

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  8. Krystal- Thanks sweetie you are always so supportive, I hope we get to meet one day so i can give u the biggest hug ever!!

    Jesse- You know you rock right?! Cuz ya do in case you didn't know, just sayin.. :) THANK YOU for the prayers, they mean the world to me!

    George- Thank you.. This journey can be SO hard and yucky.. I am blessed to have so many people supporting me, it makes such a difference knowing you aren't alone.

    Michael- I was knocked down for a sec, but I am dusted off and forging ahead, you are so sweet to drop in during your own 2ww! HUGS!

    Rebekah- My love!! You know I adore you right? Will update with new info soon, I promise! :)

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  9. I am beyond thrilled to hear that you are not throwing in the towel. I am looking forward to continuing to cheer you on!!! Love ya, girl!!

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  10. Tonya! I am so glad to hear you are moving ahead! From one IM to another... just keep moving. The set backs are hard and it's important to let yourself feel sad for a little while. Pick yourself up and pick a new plan of attack!
    I was 40 when I harvested my eggs for my surrogacy and I tried a lot of egg improvment strategies..Organic diet, meditation and accupunture. Just some ideas as you gear up for another retrieval. I will be stalking you! Reach out to me anytime! Good Luck!

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  11. You are such a trooper! I'm so sorry to hear about the second chemical. That sucks so bad. But I am glad you're not giving up!

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  12. Thank you! Can I hire you to coach me through this and your payment will be one healthy baby for you! Oh I wish I could do that for you :) So really 4wks6days. Can you tell me how you figured it out? I probably sound like a dummy.

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