I have no words...

Seriously, y'all tell me what you think, is it worth doing beta tomorrow even??? HELP ME!! The last two are TODAY.. The 2nd to last was this AM the last about 45mins ago.. This shit sux BIG TIME..

Things are looking dimmer by the second...

Soooo... Took another wondfo (Internet Cheapie) and it's LIGHTER today then the two from yesterday.. Methinks we are in chemical pregnancy territory again.. We are more than likely not even doing the beta tomorrow.. I cannot see spending $300 for them to tell us what we already know.. This is EXACTLY what happened last time, except I paid the $600 over 3 days to find out what we already knew.. Here are the tests for your viewing pleasure.. The last test is from this AM.

. 

POAS Chronicles: 8dp6dfet

 I am thoroughly confused... Wondfo internet cheapies still showing darker.. LOVE THAT! First Response Early Results are the same if not a SMIDGE LIGHTER, WTF?!?! Digital... HOURGLASS FOR OVER AN HOUR.. Yeah... THOROUGHLY CONFUSED!!! Here are both sets of tests.. 

Last 2 taken TODAY approx 8-10hrs apart

 

Last 2 taken TODAY

Last digital will be taken tomorrow then we just wait for beta, I am SO OVER these hpts, UGH!

Mayhaps I jumped the gun...

OK.. so after my epic freak out yesterday and some words of wisdom from a few girls on a surrogate forum (smo) and of course searching Dr. Google. I felt a little better when I finally went to sleep at O dark thirty this morning.. Well my friend and I texted back and forth and we decided we are going to STOP TESTING after Tonight... Well, kinda.. We are gonna do it tonight and then not again until Monday AM before she goes in for beta, because after that the fat lady is gonna sing anyway and we will have our answer.. Annnywho.. So these are the wondfo's from 5dpt PM thru 8dp EARLY AM! What ya think? 

 

Please pray Mo continues to be a little fighter!!

POAS Chronicles: 7dp6dfet

So today's test is darker...BUT just barely.. I can't help but feel like this might be a repeat of last time.. TRUST ME, I don't want to think that, but there it is... Funny thing is the strip test is darker noticeably, but the First Response is a SMIDGE darker.. This is going to be the longest weekend of my life...*siiigh***

OK so here it is: starting from the top the two strip tests, yesterday and today and the FRER today's, yesterdays is the last picture..

POAS Chronicles: 6dp6dfet

I'm just gonna cut to the chase here is tonight's picture, she couldn't wait until 10PM our designated time, so impatient! LOL!

 

Can you see it??? OMG!! We are cautiously optimistic!

NOT SO FAST!!

Soooo it appears we HAVE A LINE TONIGHT!!!! OMG! I CANNOT post a pic because it is SO FAINT that you will go blind trying to see it.. But on my cell it's faintly there.. I emailed it to myself and almost lost my eyeballs trying to see it on that fuzzy picture, UGH! So.. The plan is to test again tomorrow evening and see if there is a definite darkening that I can post here for all of you faithful POAS'ers and readers!

 

I added this in because I am going to add the new one from tonight and hopefully there is a noticeable difference! This is last nights tests in B&W cause there is NO HOPE of seeing it otherwise, lol!

POAS Chronicles: 5dp6dfet

It has begun... I wasn't sure if we were going to POAS (pee on a stick) or not, but we caved.. Got the call this AM that is was negative.. I'm bummed, but not devastated.. Why you ask? Because my scientific brain tells me this is still REALLY EARLY.. Even though I know of girls who have gotten BFP this early or even yesterday, I am still ok.. Some of them transferred more than one embryo (makes sense to have BFP if they are carrying multiples) and some transferred one embryo on the same day as my friend had ours transferred (that's the part that bums me out).. My friend is going to keep on peeing (because we are gluttons for punishment) until we run out of tests, which will be Sunday night.. We are going to stick with testing at night time because we think we have better luck then.. So, when I have news tonight I will update, it's either bfp tonight or still negative, either way... THERE'S ALWAYS TOMORROW! Til then...

Introducing...

MO! In all his/her celly little glory:

 We are feeling really optimistic and hoping MO is getting snuggled in good in my friends belly.. THANK YOU EVERYONE for all of your warm wishes, babydust, sticky vibes, finger crossing and prayers! They mean the world to us! Our beta is August 1st, but IF I have some news to report sooner, of course I will! We are really trying not to read too much into the cramping/not cramping, tugging/not tugging symptoms because they can all be caused by the meds so the pee sticks and/or beta is really going to give us the answer, ya know? We are all thinking positive vibes and just ticking off the days until we get to find out!! 

So Overwhelmed

Back from transfer and everything went GREAT! RE said "MO" looked beautiful goin in to freeze and beautiful coming out! Minimal cell loss and they did assisted hatching! I will add the picture once I get back home to my scanner. I can't believe how many comments and well wishes you guys all left, it made me cry!! You guys are THE BEST! The RE's office moved from their old location, so the new place is smaller and at first the nurse said we both couldn't be in the room.. In unison we BOTH said "Uh, that's not an option" LOL! My friend spoke up so fast I didn't even need to. She said "They have gone through TOO MUCH and come too far NOT TO SEE THIS, make it happen" She said ok we will make it happen and they did! Such an amazing thing to see. We watched "MO" land and we all waited until they said she could get up. We joked for her not to pee MO out, haha!! So now we wait.. Beta is August 1st (Day before my Mom's birthday and my son's 16th bday so hopefully I get some extra luck from them!!) We DO plan on POAS, but I don't know when we will start.. We are both gunshy after last time so we want to but we are both scared a little bit as well.. WE will see...

We are just so overwhelmed today.. AND THANKFUL for our friends, our family and the possibilities.. OK off to whip up some meals for my wonderful friend and her family.. Will be back with an update soon I'm sure! LOVE YOU ALL! AND THANK YOU AGAIN!

We are on our way!

We got in to Georgia yesterday afternoon around dinner time and Rebekah Rose so graciously whipped up a FEAST for us to enjoy! She was more wonderful than I imagined she would be and her son is a JOY to be around, such an awesome guy.. So after we gorged ourselves on dinner and visited for a few we had to head out to meet up with my friend and her family. Annie did not disappoint, her son was IN LOVE as soon as he saw her, as was my friend, so that reinforces that we made a good choice and she is the perfect dog for their family!!! In a few minutes we are heading out the door to the clinic for the transfer! No news is good news on these mornings and we haven't gotten a call so as far as we know "MO" has survived the thaw! Transfer is at 11:30 so we are heading out to ATL to get "MO" back with us! Wish us luck and I will update when we get back later! MUAH!

T-Minus 1 Day

Toooomorrow, tomorrow.. I LOVE YA tomorrow.. You're Onnnlyyy a dayyyy aaaaway!!! It's finally here!! Tomorrow is the big day and as long as we don't get a call from the clinic tomorrow morning (that means Mo didn't make it if they call--- we won't even speak that into existence!) then we proceed as planned to the clinic! I still don't have a transfer time yet, the nurse emailed me yesterday and said they would be calling me today with the transfer time for tomorrow, I am assuming it's gonna be in the afternoon sometime, but ya never know... SO, we are about to hit the road on our way to GA! I am hoping that the drive north goes smoothly. I am planning on making a stop to visit a wonderful surrogate who has been so supportive and helpful to me through our journey. The one, the only REBEKAH ROSE!!! SUPER EXCITED about meeting her! So that's the plan peoples.. We should be back home Sunday night. I am taking my laptop so I will update from the road if I am not having too much fun visiting with everyone, haha! Say a prayer for "MO" that he thrives tomorrow and a few for our safe travels! MUAH!

Countdown to FET: T- Minus 4 Days

Can you believe it?!?!?! Transfer is in FOUR DAYS!!! My wonderful friend and her family are having a quick family vacay this week before we get wrapped up in all things FET and baby! We are coming to town Thursday and then BAM, transfer the next day! I am spending the next couple of days getting my house in order because we have company coming in almost as soon as we get back! So much to do and so little time, but I like it because I don't have as much down time to sit and worry myself crazy.. (I save that for night time,HA!) Anyway so PIO started last night and we are that much closer! Will update when we have a set transfer time, hopefully in the next couple of days!

Countdown to FET: T- Minus 8 Days

Just over a week until FET! We leave for Georgia Thursday for our Friday transfer. Next week can't get here fast enough!!

LINING CHECK: Update

Lining check went FABULOUS! Her lining is at 9.5mm-10mm with a triple stripe (so pretty much PERFECT!) since we are still 9 days out it will only get fluffier by transfer day. I also found out what the actual embryo grade is for "Mo". To give you some background, here is my clinic's grading system on Blastocysts:

The numbers 1 - 4 are given as grade for the inner cell mass and then the trophectoderm (lining of the egg). 1 is best 4 is worst. Those grades in the other systems are A-C with grading in between like AB, BC, etc as well. My little "Mo" has 1's on both of those which is the BEST!!

The next grading is based on the entire blast and is based on hatching. That is the A through E.

A is a completely hatched blast (don't want to go that far before transfer if possible)
B is partially hatched
C is a full blast completely filling the shell
D is a blast just beginning expansion
E is a blast that they can see the cavity but they can't tell enough to grade it because it's too early


"Mo" is a grade C1 1.. WAY TO GO MO!!! So we are feeling VERY hopeful today after getting all of this news! Now we just have to survive the thaw, my next stress... Does it ever end?!?! In the mean time, we are just enjoying this feeling we have that things are looking really good.. We know they did last time too, but right now they are looking even better since the embryo is already farther along in growth then the previous ones were at transfer.. I won't have much to report in the next few days but if anything else comes up, you guys will be the first to know!

LINING CHECK: Part Deux

Our lining check was supposed to be on Thursday, but the RE is going to be at a different office and my friend has to go out of town unexpectedly Friday so they pushed it up to tomorrow!! We are hoping her lining looks good and we can continue pushing forward for the Embryo Transfer NEXT WEEK! That's right you read it right, we are heading to transfer in 9 days! (well 9 days from tomorrow) We also decided we are going to be there for this transfer!! We are really excited! We didn't go to the last one since it was in the middle of the week, but since this is on a Friday we are going and that way I can make a few nice meals for my friend to have so she can rest! Please send a few prayers up that her lining looks good tomorrow AND continued prayers for our little "Mo" that we survive the thaw and make it to transfer we need some sticky vibes everyone! Will update tomorrow when I have news after lunch time on the lining check.. Until then!

T Minus Fourteen Days

Fourteen days until our FET with "Mo"! My friend is on estrace and baby aspirin. Today the dose changes so I know we are getting closer! Next week we have the lining check to make sure it's thick enough, but not too thick and then 8 days later is the day! I have read more info than I ever thought on day 6 transfers and success rates, and I can't read anymore about it.. I sway between excitement and being terrified of it not working.. I know they give you their percentages but in my opinion it's 50/50 in any given cycle that you will have success, because it either works or it doesn't ya know? So we are hoping that this time we fall on the right side of the odds, even with having to do a single embryo transfer! So that's all for now.. Atleast after transfer the two week wait will go by fairly quickly because I have friends coming in to town and then family right after that so that will keep me busy! Enjoy your weekend!