Hard Week

So as you all know we had a chemical pregnancy AGAIN... Well what you may have forgotten is that my Brother-in-law, Sister-in-law and their kids were in town.. Their kids are 8 years old, 6 years old, 3 years old and 9 months.. SUPER HARD WEEK for me.. I lost it all day Monday and everyone handled it pretty well.. I stayed in my room for a few hours and cried my eyes out and no one bothered me.. Hubby came in at some point and just held me.. He is so amazing and strong.. We decided we WILL TRY AGAIN.. I just don't know when.. I told my friend what I was feeling regarding having to wait for almost 2 years and she said we can go now if we are ready.. I WOULD LOVE TO start again immediately but really, I think we do need this break.. I am worn out emotionally and financially. I never thought $30,000 later we would still be at the beginning of our journey.. I talked to our lawyer and explained everything to her and she said changes can be made to update our contract for minimal costs (I hope her idea of minimal and mine are the same thing!) and I have to talk to someone at the new clinic we want to go to and see if the psych eval would need updating as well and if not, the only issue with waiting would be my age and if my FSH and AMH changed in a bad way, since right now they are both perfect (I don't know how considering my last 2 cycles sucked!) SO, right now we are gathering info.. My friend said if we need to go first we can and that makes me feel better knowing we don't HAVE to wait if we can swing it financially.. So this post is to let everyone know OUR JOURNEY ISN'T OVER YET! :)